1. How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one.
2. How many Candains does it take to change a lightbulb?
One to whack it out with his hockey stick, and one to screw in the new one.
3. How many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One to screw it in, 2 to support him, and 1 to disagree with his lightbulb approach.
4. How many terrorists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
1 to crash a plane into the lightbulb, and 1 to put in the new lightbulb.
5. How many soccer players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One to take out the old one, one to attempt to kick it in to the socket, and one to buy new bulbs after the kicking attemts fail.