5W1H boo!

Sloth

  • I Need it Badly

    in

    Now I haven’t known you very long and I shouldn’t be asking you for this so soon, but I really need it badly. I haven’t had it for a while and I can already feel it going in good and hard and coming out nice and soft. If you would do this for me no…

  • A Few Mottos

    in

    Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. Indecision is the key to flexibility. Hang in there, retirement is only 30 years away! Aim low; reach your goals; avoid disappointment. Teamwork means never having to take the blame yourself. A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat. If…

  • Lousiana Law

    in

    A big city lawyer went duck hunting in South Louisiana. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded,…

  • How to Keep Her Busy

    in

    How do you keep a blond busy? Write “please turn over” on both sides of a paper!

  • The Panda

    in

    A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, “Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter, and you didn’t even pay for your sandwich!”. “Hey, man,…

  • Record Breaker

    in

    A man is just about to break a record. Suddenly, a dog jump up and bites him on the neck. Q: Is the dog owned by the former record keeper? A: Yes. Q: Did the former record keeper intend this to stop other people from breaking his record? A: Yes. The murderer doesn’t want other…

  • The Gay bar

    in

    Four gay guys walk into a gay bar and they find a problem. There’s only one stool left. One guy says “Lets flip for it” But another says “No, Lets flip it over”

  • Dalmatian Puppy

    in

    Why can’t a dalmatian puppy hide from his mom? ‘Cause he’s already been spotted!

  • A Wise Man

    in

    A wise man once said. I Don’t know ask A Girl! A wise man Once Said. Life sucks and then we die.

  • I like the way you Think

    in

    Little Johnny’s school was having show and tell, so the teacher started a ‘Guess What’s Behind My Back’ game. She went to her desk and picked something up. “Okay class,” she said, “guess what’s behind my back. It’s red, round, and shiny.” “I know, teacher! It’s an apple!” shouted Little Johnny! The teacher replied, “No…

  • Blonde Golfers

    in

    Two blondes were starting a round of golf together. On the first tee, the first blonde smacked a beautiful drive down the center of the fairway. With a smile, she picked up the tee and walked to the cart. The second blonde cranked another good drive down the center of the fairway. Pleased, she hopped…

  • Belly Buttons Explained

    in

    Q: How do babies get their belly buttons? A: When God finishes making little babies, He lines them all up in a row, then he walks along in front of them. He pokes each one in the tummy with His finger and says, “You’re done, you’re done, you’re done, – – -“