Sloth
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Examination Time
in JokesA candidate brought dice into the examination hall for MCQ. He started tossing the dice to select his answers. The superintendent just gave a glimpse at this candidate, as he passed by, as it is common to have students trying their luck. Very soon the candidate finished his whole paper and slept on his table.…
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Hop Scotch
in JokesYo momma’s so fat, she plays hopscotch like this : Washington, California, Nevada, now Arizona
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Sooooooooooooooo Fat
in JokesYo Momma so fat that when she went to school she had to sit next to everyjoke. Yo Momma so fat, her belt size is Equator. Yo Momma so fat, this guy was having sex with her, then rolled over twice and was still on her.
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Steve Wright V
in JokesI went to the eye doctor and found out I needed glasses for reading. So, I got some flip-up contact lenses. Winny would spend all of his time practicing limbo. He got pretty good. He could go under a rug. I was walking down the street and saw a sign on a post. It said:…
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Telegram
in JokesA man, fond of practical jokes, decided late one night to send his friend a collect telegram which read, “I am perfectly well.” A week later, the joker received a heavy parcel – collect – on which he had to pay considerable charges. Upon opening it, he found a big block of concrete which had…
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Class of 2006
in JokesHaving just graduated from Harvard, the young man was very excited thinking about his future. Getting into a taxi, the driver says to him, “How are you on this beautiful, sunny day?” “I’m the class of 2006. I just graduated from Harvard and I’m very excited about getting out there and seeing what the world…
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Most Complaining Woman In the Bible
in JokesWho was the most complaining woman in the bible? Mary, because she got on Joseph’s ass and rode it all the way to Bethlehem.
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Brains or Intelligence?
in JokesAll members of Mensa have I.Q.s of at least 140. At one Mensa convention, several members at a local cafe noticed the shaker with an S on top, for salt, contained pepper and their pepper shaker, with a P on top, was full of salt. How could they swap the contents of the bottles without…
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The Person
in JokesFill in the blank: The person who spends all of today bragging about what he is going to accomplish tomorrow probably did the very same thing _________. Yesterday.
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On The Plane
in JokesA guy with a black eye boards his plane and sits down in his seat. He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye, too. He says to him, “Hey this is a coincidence, we both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours?” The other guy says,…
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On Safari
in JokesThree hunters, Chuck, Thomas and Mick, are on safari. Unfortunately they are captured by cannibals, who start getting the cooking pots ready. The cannibal chief tells them they can each have one last wish. “What’s your last request?” he asks Chuck, an American. “I’d like a steak,” he replies, so the cannibals kill a wildebeeste…
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Pregnant Advice
in JokesQ. Am I more likely to get pregnant if my husband wears boxers rather than briefs? A. Yes, but you’ll have an even better chance if he doesn’t wear anything at all. Q. What is the easiest way to figure out exactly when I got pregnant? A. Have sex once a year. Q. What is…