5W1H boo!

Sloth

  • Science Fiction Geek Pick-up Lines

    in

    – “Someone must have shot you with a phaser set on ‘stunning.’” – “I can’t help it — my eyes are trapped in the gravitational field of your breasts!!” – “Nice Asimov.” – “Not only can I beam you aboard, I can beam you a woody.” – “Earth woman, prepare to be probed!” – “I’m…

  • Simple Advice

    in

    By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found inner peace…….. The article read: “The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you’ve started.” So I looked around the house to see all the things I started and hadn’t finished….and before leaving the house this morning…

  • The Shepherd…

    in

    A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand new Jeep Cherokee advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and a YSL tie leaned out of the window and asked our shepherd: “If I can…

  • Yogurt

    in

    Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, a tub of cottage chesse, says to them, “We don’t serve your kind in here.” One of the yogurt cartons says back to him, “Why not? We’re cultured individuals.”

  • Existentialists

    in

    How many Existentialists does it take to change a light bulb? What light bulb?

  • The Plane Trip

    in

    A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on an airplane. The lawyer gets bored, so he looks over to the blond and smiles, thinking maybe he can make use of his time. “Hey,” he says to the blonde, “Do you want to play a game?” The blonde shakes her head and…

  • Story of a happy dog

    in

    Trouser was normally a happy-go-lucky dog. He would chase tennis balls, play with other doggies, and eat his dinner without a fuss. He was a dog without a care. But on that fateful autumn afternoon, it was to be different. Trouser’s owners were walking him along a trail at the park, when suddenly from out…

  • Talking With Time

    in

    What did the clock say to the wristwatch? “I enjoyed tocking with you, but now you’re starting to tick me off.”

  • The Greatest Liar

    in

    Cinderella, Superman and Pinocchio die and go to heaven. On their way they talk: Cinderella: “I want to be remembered as the most beautiful girl in the world.” Superman: “I want to be remembered as the strongest person in the world.” Pinocchio: “I want to be remembered as the greatest liar in the world.” It’s…

  • Getting a Job

    in

    A brunette, a redhead and a blonde all apply for the same job. The manager says, “I can only hire one of you so I’m going to ask you each a question and whoever answers it correctly gets the job.” He takes the brunette into the room and asks her, “How many D’s in Indiana…

  • List of Marriage oneliners

    in

    Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that. After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” She replied, “Yes, dear,…

  • Actors

    in

    How many actors does it take to change a light bulb? Only one-they don’t like to share the spotlight.