5W1H boo!

Sloth

  • 100 Dollar Bill

    in

    Q: Santa Claus, the tooth fairy an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A: The old drunk of course; the other three are mythical creatures.

  • Map of the World

    in

    I have a map of the world… its actual size.

  • Operator?

    in

    “Operator? I’d like the number of the Scottish knitwear company in Woven.” “I can’t find a town called ‘Woven’? Are you sure?” “Yes. That’s what it says on the label – ‘Woven in Scotland’.”

  • It’s The Law III

    in

    Florida: Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner. If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle. Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown. SARASOTA –…

  • Red Wagon

    in

    Johnny was walking down the street pulling his wagon when he stubbed his toe. He was swearing like crazy when a priest comes up to him and says “Johnny, I wouldn’t say such things, God is everywhere.” Intrigued by the priest’s comment, he questions the priest. “Is God over there?” he says pointing to a…

  • Pictures

    in

    Your mom is so fat her picture fell down.

  • Environmentalists

    in

    A rich lady from California, who was a tree hugger and a vociferous anti-hunter, purchased a piece of timberland in Oregon. There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She wanted to get a good view of her land so she started to climb the big tree. As she…

  • Exercise

    in

    The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

  • Golden

    in

    Silence is golden, because you never have to explain something you didn’t say.

  • Blue Jay, Cardinal…

    in

    There were three girls and a genie on a mountain. There was a redhead, a brunette and a blonde. The only one who knew how to get off the mountain was the genie, but she offered the girls a wish to turn into birds and fly off. “I want to be a blue jay so…

  • Zack and His Mule…

    in

    Zack and his mule were walking down the road when one of Zack’s friends drove up and offered him a ride to town. Zack got into the truck while his mule ran along behind. The mule was right in back of them as they reached 55, and stayed with them as they sped up to…

  • Mice in the Kremlin

    in

    -How do you deal with mice in the Kremlin? -Put up a sign saying “collective farm”. Then half the mice will starve and the others will run away.