5W1H boo!

Sloth

  • Divorce

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    What’s the Swedish word for divorce and swearing? Ikea.

  • The TRUE Story of Creation…

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    In the beginning, God created the Heaven and the Earth, and the Earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of deep. And the Devil said, ‘It doesn’t get any better than this.’ And so God created Man in His own image; Male and female created He them. And God looked…

  • Equipped

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    Note: This is an exact replication of National Public Radio (NPR) interview between a female broadcaster, and US Army General Reinwald, who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military installation. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base? GENERAL…

  • Grass-eater

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    A blonde was driving along in her car one day, when she noticed a man at the side of the road, eating grass. She pulled over and asked him “Why are you eating the grass?” The man replied, “I’m too poor to afford any food, so I have to eat the grass to stay alive.”…

  • Actual Quotes From Court

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    What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? Gucci sweats and Reeboks. And where was the location of the accident? Approximately milepost 498. And where is milepost 498? Probably between milepost 498 and 500. Did you blow your horn or anything? After the accident? Before the accident. Sure, I played for ten…

  • More Nonsense Words

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    Faunacated (adj.) How wildlife ends up when its environment is destroyed. Hence Faunacatering (v.), which has made a meal of many species. Grantartica (n.) The cold, isolated place where art companies dwell without funding. Hemaglobe (n.) The bloody state of the world. Kinstirpation (n.) A painful inability to move relatives who come to visit.

  • Gods Messanger

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    A college professor, an avowed atheist, was teaching his class. He shocked several of his students when he flatly stated he was going to prove there was no God. Addressing the ceiling he shouted: “God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I’ll give you 15 minutes!” The…

  • Two Blondes

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    Two blondes were building a house. One saw that the other was going into her pouch and throwing every other nail out. She thought that this was weird and decided to look into. “Why do you keep throwing every other nail away?” “Well, when I pull one out of my pouch, and it is facing…

  • Chicken Shoes

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    What kind of sneakers do chickens wear? Re-bok-bok-bok-bok-bok.

  • Driven to Distraction

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    – Only in America can a pizza guy get to your door faster than an ambulance. – Why do slow-down and slow-up mean the same thing? – Why are wise man and wise guy opposites? – Why is it that when stuff goes on a truck it’s called a shipment and on a boat it’s…

  • Chemists’ Last Words

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    1. And now, the taste test. 2. Are we supposed to heat that? 3. And now a little bit from this… 4. … and please keep that test tube alone! 5. And now shake it a bit. 6. Why is there no label on this bottle? 7. In which glass was my mineral water? 8.…

  • Watch Out For Those Ladies’ Commode!

    in

    A man, traveling by plane, was in urgent need of a restroom facility but each time he tried, it was occupied. The flight attendant, aware of his predicament, suggested he use the attendant’s ladies’ room, but cautioned him not to press any of the buttons. There next to the paper roll were four buttons marked:…