Sloth
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Buying Candy
in JokesThree little boys went into a candy store. “I want two cents worth of jelly beans,” the first boy said to the clerk. The clerk frowned. The jelly beans were on the top self, and he didn’t like climbing up there just to sell two cents worth, but he did it. When he came down,…
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The Elephant and the Turtle
in JokesAn elephant was drinking out of a river one day, when he spotted a turtle asleep on a log. He ambled on over and kicked it clear across the river. “What did you do that for?” asked a passing giraffe. “Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my…
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2 of the Best Chuck Norris Jokes Ever
in Jokes1. Chuck Norris beat the brick wall in tennis. 2. The boogy man does not wait for chuck norris, Chuck Norris waits for the boogy man.
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Doraemon and Hello Kitty
in JokesPart 1 One day, Doraemon was walking down street. He saw Hello Kitty approaching him. Excited by the encounter, he walked towards Hello Kitty and said, “Good morning”. Sadly, Hello Kitty did not reply him. Why? Answer: Hello Kitty has no mouth. ———————————— Part 2 Unhappy that she broke Doraemon’s feelings, Hello Kitty decided to…
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When a Teenage Girl Smiles…
in JokesWhen a teenage girl smiles at a boy, he tries to decide what makes him so sexy. When a young lady smiles at a man in his fifties, he turns around to see who’s the handsome dude behind him. But when a female of any age smiles at a man of 80, he looks down…
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No Democrats
in JokesMrs. Colter was explaining that there were rules for voting in the United States. “You have to be at least eighteen, you have to be a citizen, and-” John blurts out, “And you can’t vote for democrats!”* * All credit for this goes to John Rieger, who wouldn’t shut up during sixth period.
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Get the Quarterback!
in JokesBen and Zero are talking when Ben says, “Hey, Zero, if you can tear this piece of paper in half, I’ll give you a quarter.” Zero then proceeds to tear the paper in half. Ben takes one of the halves, tears it in half, and gives it to Zero, saying, “Here’s your quarter!” Zero wanders…
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The 8:15
in JokesA woman goes into a doctor’s office complaining that she has constant pains in her stomach. The doctor brings her into the examining room and asks, “Well, Ma’am, are you constipated?” The woman replies, “No, I am not. I go to the bathroom every morning at 8:15, just like clockwork.” The doctor asks, “Every day,…
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Talking Dog
in JokesA man asked people for fifty-thousand dollars for his talking dog. He brings him into the bar, but the bartender doesn’t believe the dog can talk so the guy asks the dog, “What’s the opposite of smooth?” The dog says, “Rough.” And then the guy asks the dog, “What’s the part of the house that…
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Guide to Sex
in JokesWoman’s guide to sex: Lay there and pretend to enjoy the experience and when it is done tell your partner it was the best you ever had. Man’s guide to sex” In, Out repeat if necessary!