5W1H boo!

Sloth

  • Unlikable

    in

    I don’t think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.

  • Natural Sweets

    in

    Would you like some chocolate ice cream and lemonade? Yes? Ok! *shits* chocolate ice cream and *pisses* lemonade!that would be $5.00

  • I Ran Into…

    in

    BOB: Hey, I ran into George the other day. JOE: Oh, really? Was he happy to see you? BOB: Well, we were in our cars at the time…

  • One Wish

    in

    While trying to escape through Pakistan, Osama Bin Laden found a bottle on a beach and picked it up. Suddenly a female Genie arose from the bottle and with a smile said: “Master, may I grant you one wish?” “You ignorant, unworthy daughter-of-a-dog! Don’t you know who I am? I don’t need any common woman…

  • I’ll Have To Trouble You Again

    in

    A fine-looking gentleman sat down in the main dining room of an expensive restaurant. He ordered a big dinner and spent an hour enjoying himself. After he was given the check, he summoned the head waiter. “Ah, my friend,” he said, “that was a delicious meal! Perhaps you don’t remember that I was a guest…

  • Cat or Wig? Brunette or Blond?

    in

    A blond goes up to a brunette that’s wearing a puffy wig with two green ribbons on each front side. The blond says “NICE CAT! HOW DID YOU GET IT TO BALANCE ON YOUR HEAD?” The brunette tears up and says “ITS A WIG! MY FRIENDS TOLD ME IT WAS IN FASHION AND I GUESS…

  • Hairy Butt

    in

    There once was a women who bought a new house but didn’t know what to name it. So she stuck her head out the window and heard Hairy Butt! So she decided to name the house Hairy Butt. Then sometime later she had a baby boy but didn’t know what to name it, so she…

  • Walking Tour

    in

    A blonde goes on vacation to New York and wants to take a tour. She goes to ask about the tours and says, “So, where can I catch the bus for the walking tour?”

  • Stuck in a Cell

    in

    Q: Imagine you are stuck in a cell, no windows, no doors pretty much nothing. How do you get out? A: -Stop imagining!-

  • Making a Spectacle of Himself

    in

    Did you hear about the eyeglasses maker who moved his shop to an island off Alaska and is now known as an optical Aleutian?

  • OBGYN Visit

    in

    A black female is having trouble with her menses. She goes to the gynecologist and he asks: “Mrs. Williams, what kind of flow do you have?” “Linoleum” she replies.

  • Signs Of The Times

    in

    Signs That Were Found In Peoples’ Kitchens: A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen, and this kitchen is delirious. No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes. A husband is someone who takes out the trash and gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy…