5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • Defamation of Character

    in

    A woman was suing a man for defamation of character, charging that he had called her a pig. The man was found guilty and fined. After the trial, he asked the Judge, “Does this mean that I can’t call Miss Stuart a pig?” The Judge said that was accurate. “Does this also mean that I…

  • Yo da lay he

    in

    Knock Knock! Who’s there? Yo da lay he. Yo da lay he who? I didn’t know you could yodel!

  • 15 Fun Things To Do In Public Areas

    in

    15 Fun Things to do in Public Areas —————————————— (I actually did all of these) 1. Go up to random people and ask “How are you doing?” See what kind of conversation you can start. (I met lots of new people this way) 2. Ask someone what another person’s name is nearby. Go up to…

  • Advertising

    in

    Two little boys go into the grocery store. One is nine, one is four. The nine-year-old grabs a box of tampons from the shelf and carries it to the register for check-out. The cashier asks “Oh, these must be for your mom, huh?” The nine-year-old replies, “Nope, not for my mom.” Without thinking, the cashier…

  • Tree Fellers

    in

    A Norwegian applied for a job as a logger deep in the Canadian woods. The foreman took him into the bush to test his knowledge of logging. He stopped the truck, pointed at a tree, and said, “See that tree over there? Tell me its species and how many board feet of lumber are in…

  • Thinking to Myself

    in

    Today I was thinking to myself, how would my life be different if I was born one day earlier. I said nothing would change except I would have asked myself that yesterday.

  • Rules For Chocolate

    in

    Rules For Chocolate =================================== If you’ve got melted chocolate all over your hands, you’re eating it too slowly. Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want. The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in hot car. The solution:…

  • When I was Six Months Pregnant…

    in

    When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three-year-old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, “Mommy, you are getting fat!” I replied, “Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy.” “I know,” she replied, “but what’s growing in…

  • If Brains Were Fuel!!!

    in

    If brains were fuel, you wouldn’t have enough to power an ant’s motorcycle around the edge of a penny.

  • Eating Pizza

    in

    A truck driver picks up a woman hitch hiker on the side o the road. He pulls over on the side of the road a few blocks down and the woman asks him what he is doing? He asks her if she wants to have sex? She says “I can’t I’m on my period.” He…

  • The Horse

    in

    George W. Bush was invited to visit the Queen of England. The Queen gets her finest horses and buggy. When Bush gets off the plane, and onto the buggy, Bush and the Queen ingage in a conversation. In the middle of their conversation, one of the horse let out a really big, really smelly fart.…

  • Dirty Mama

    in

    Yo mama so dirty that she was banned from a sewage facility because of sanitation worries!