Jokes

  • Dads

    My Dad is great at raising kids, if he can remember which are his.

  • Life Goes On

    One night, a torrential rain soaked South Louisiana; the next morning the resulting floodwaters came up about 6 feet into most of the homes. Mrs. Boudreaux was sitting on her roof with her neighbor, Mrs. Wilson, waiting for help to come. Mrs. Wilson noticed a lone baseball cap floating near the house. Then she saw…

  • Why Eat Healthy?

    1. I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die from natural causes. 2. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

  • Try Our Curries

    Sign outside a Chinese restaurant: Try our curries, you’ll never get better.

  • Winning and Quitting

    If winners never quit, and quitters never win… Who was the fool who said, “Quit while you’re ahead”.

  • The Tattoo

    A woman goes into a tattoo parlour and tells the tattoo artist that she wants a tattoo of a turkey on her right thigh just below her bikini line. She also wants him to put “Happy Thanksgiving” under the turkey. So the guy does it and it comes out looking really good. The woman then…

  • Beer

    Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy!

  • Date

    A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do? His mother had an idea: “Why don’t you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your apartment for a home- cooked meal?” He thought this was a great…

  • The River

    Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large, raging violent river. Needing to get on the other side, the first man prayed, “God, please give me the strength to cross the river.” Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across in about…

  • Aunt Carol

    A teacher of a fifth grade class gave her students an assignment. The assignment was to ask their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and each had a turn to tell their stories. “Peter, do you have a story to…

  • Peculiarities

    What is more peculiar than watching a catfish? Watching a goldfish bowl.

  • Yo Momma So Skinny

    Yo mama is so skinny Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio Yo mama so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex. Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and disappeared.