Jokes

  • Sharks

    3 sharks meet in the ocean. They talk about the people they recently have eaten. The first one says, “I swallowed the Ayatollah yesterday, but the guy had eaten so much garlic I still feel sick.” The second shark says, “That’s nothing pal! I swallowed Boris Yeltsin last week and the old guy had so…

  • Present For a Black Man

    What did the little black boy get for his birthday? Your bike.

  • T.G.I.F

    A Blonde is getting on an elevator and meets a gentleman on board. “T.G.I.F.” she says. “S.H.I.T” was his reply. Puzzled she replied “T.G.I.F” The gentleman was getting a little disturbed the the remark, so he says again. “S.H.I.T.”. The Blonde leans over and whispers “THANK GOD IT’S FRIDAY”. The gentleman responses with “SORRY, HONEY…

  • DMV

    Did you hear about the director of the Department of Motor Vehicles who resigned on Tuesday? He tried to resign on Monday, but discovered he’d been standing in the wrong line.

  • Squirrel

    Why did the squirrel go to the acorn shop? He broke his nuts on something!

  • Read Its Important

    newf is cool timmy cool is cool battery is cool girliepie is cool newf is cool drunky is cool all on my buddy list are cool all on wocka are cool all on braingle are cool all on earth are cool all in the many universes are cool I just said you’re cool vote full…

  • Uh Oh…

    You know you’re screwed when you fall in love with a woman you see at the mall, then realize that she is your sister.

  • More Racist Jokes…

    What do you call a group of white people running down a hill? Avalanche! What do you call a group of black people running down a hill? Mudslide! What do you call a group of Latinos running down a hiil? JAILBREAK! How do you find the country of Mexico? Roll a quarter down a hill.…

  • Bright

    Why did the teacher have to put on her glasses during class? Because the kids were to bright!

  • Old Couple and Friend

    Once there was an old man 70 years old named Bob who was married to his 73 year old wife, Mary. They had their grandchild, named Caroline over. Once they got home from their walk, Bob offered Caroline some hot chocolate, toast, and eggs. “Of course!” She said with delight. Then, Bob goes in to…

  • Eight Legs

    Q: What has eight legs, two trunks, four eyes, and two tails? A: Two elephants.

  • Polar Bear in Jungle

    Q)what do you call a polar bear in the jungle? A)lost!