Jokes
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Winning The Nobel Prize!
in JokesA man is driving down a country road, when he spots a male farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. Of course the farmer is a blond. 🙂 He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking…
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Hold That Thought!
in JokesON MODERNISM How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools. THOUGHTS ON METAPHYSICS Deja Vu: The feeling that somehow, somewhere, you’ve been kicked in the head like this before. ON DEEP THOUGHTS A day…
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What is That? Who is That?
in JokesAn old Jewish man was finally allowed to leave the Soviet Union, to emigrate to Israel. When he was searched at the Moscow airport, the customs official found a bust of Lenin. Customs: What is that? Old man: What is that? What is that?! Don’t say “What is that?” say “Who is that?” That is…
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Micheal Jackson and a PS2
in JokesWhat do Micheal Jackson and a PS2 have in common? They’re both plastic, can be black or white and can be turned on by children.
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The Dilemma
in JokesWhat do you do if you discover an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?
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Fresh Fish Sold Here
in JokesA store owner makes a sign to hang in his window. FRESH FISH SOLD HERE A critic walks into the store and asks the owner if he would like his store critiqued. He says yes. “Well, first thing’s the sign,” says the critic. “‘Fresh Fish Sold Here’? Well, where else would you sell ’em?” FRESH…
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I Hit Two…
in JokesA man said to his golfing friend, “I hit two of my best balls yesterday!” “Oh yeah?” “Yeah, I stepped on a rake in the bunker.”
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Steve’s Mom
in JokesJerry: So you have both a nice mommy and a pretty mommy? Steve: Yup. They’re lesbians.
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The Requirements of This Job
in JokesEmployer: “In this job we need someone who is responsible.” Applicant: “I’m the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible.”