Jokes

  • A Blonde and Red Head

    What did the blonde say to the red head? Nothing. She couldn’t remember what she was going to say!

  • Discrimination

    It was recess and the pre-schoolers came in. The teacher asked Susie what she did today. ”Well, I played in the sandbox,” she said. The teacher said, ”If you can spell sand, I’ll give you a fresh-baked cookie.” So Susie did. Then Billy came in and the teacher asked what he did. ”I played in…

  • Lover / Friend

    “The attractive man I met last night insists he just wants to be friends,” the girl told her Aunt. “Now I know what to do with a lover, but what the heck do I do with a ‘friend’?” The wise old lady smiled and said, “The same as with your lover, dearie, only not quite…

  • Blondy’s Logic About… Grey Hairs

    How you get rid of grey hairs: 1. Dye all your hair the color grey. 2. Shave your head. 3. Now you have no grey hairs.

  • Hunchback

    Yo momma is so hunchbacked, she has to wear safety goggles when she pees.

  • Have You Ever Wondered….

    Have you ever wondered….. Why Most homes have lots of windows in the house, how ever, more than half of them are usually covered up with blinds so people can’t see you. If blind people can still see kindness in a person. Would they still have the same motto ” No Shirt, No pants, No…

  • The Fibonacci Sequence

    The Fibonacci sequence 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21… starts with two 1’s, and each term afterward is the sum of its two predecessors. Which one of the ten digits is the last to appear in the units position of a number in the Fibonacci sequence? Just write out their units digits, and…

  • Indecent Exposure

    A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts. A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks, “Ma’am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?” “Why, officer?” asks the blonde. “Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed.” “Oh my goodness,” exclaims the…

  • Investment Tips for 2004….

    for all of you with any money left ……… In the wake of the Exxon/Mobile deal and the AOL/Time Warner implode, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations in 2004: 1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay…

  • Why Do They Call You Tex?

    A little guy is seated next to a big guy at a bar and asks his name. The big guy says, “They call me Tex.” The little guy replies, “Oh, you must be from Texas.” The big guy says, “Nope. I’m from Louisiana.” “Hmmm,” the little guy replies, “Then why do they call you Tex?”…

  • Widdle Wabbits (A Thtory To Warm Your Heart)

    A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp, “Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?” As the shopkeeper’s heart melts, he gets down on his knees, so that he’s on her level, and asks, “Do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft and fuwwy…

  • Chilli

    Yo momma so dumb, that when we told her it was chilly outside she ran out with a bowl and a spoon.