5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • “Under the Sea”

    in

    A man comes from a foreign country and buys a T.V. to learn some English, he turns to the first channel and it says, “I did it, I did it I’m a big kid now.” He turns to the next channel and it said, “Fork and knife, fork and knife.” He turns to one of…

  • Uh-Oh, Flight Trouble!

    in

    During a trip from California to Indiana, it didn’t help that my connecting flight from Denver was delayed twice because of mechanical problems. Then, after we were aloft, I noticed the lights began flickering. I mentioned this to a flight attendant. “I’ll take care of it,” she said. Moments later the lights went out. Clearly…

  • Which Friend?

    in

    The sailor came home from a secret two year mission only to find his wife with a new born baby. Furious, he was determined to track down the father to extract revenge. “Was it my friend Sam?” he demanded. “No!” his weeping wife replied. “Was it my friend Jim then?” he asked. “NO!” she said…

  • Fat Chance

    in

    Ever notice that “fat chance” and “slim chance” mean the same thing?

  • Can You Tell Time?

    in

    If you can tell time… Why can’t you tell that I don’t have time for you?

  • Milk Carton

    in

    Yo Mama is so fat that when she ran away they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.

  • The Local Water

    in

    A Welshman, walking through a field, sees a man drinking water from a pool with his hands. He shouts, “Paid a yfed y dwr mae’r gwartheg yn cachi yn y dwr!” (Don’t drink the water, there’s cow shit in it!) The man shouts back, “I’m English, I don’t understand you!” The Welshman calls back, “Use…

  • The Absence

    in

    Mom: Why did you get a grade so low? Junior: Because of absence. Mom: Who, You? Junior: No, the kid who sits right next to me.

  • What’s the Big Dif.?

    in

    What’s the difference between a religious woman and a supposedly regular woman in a bathtub? One has HOPE in her soul.

  • T-Shirt Messages IV

    in

    Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly and for the same reason. The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it limits. Drive carefully. It’s not only cars that can be recalled by their maker. Go ahead and take risks. Just be sure that everything will…

  • Price Chopper

    in

    How many Price Chopper employees does it take to wash a table? Three; one to wash it and two to supervise.

  • Bloodshot

    in

    A policeman pulls over a reckless driver along the road. Going up to the driver’s window, he takes one look and notes, “Your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?” The driver looks up out of those bloodshot eyes and responds, “Your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating donuts?”