5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • Another Dinosaur

    in

    What do you call a one-eyed dinosaur? Dyouthinkhesaurus

  • Premature Pupil

    in

    “Teacher, I can’t do this problem!” “Any five year old can do that problem.” “Damn! No wonder I can’t do it! I’m almost ten!”

  • The Judge Had Just Awarded…

    in

    The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged non-support. He said to Ole, “I have decided to give your wife $400 a month for support.” “Vell, dat’s fine, Judge,” said Ole. “And vunce in a while I’ll try to chip in a few bucks, myself.”

  • Gross Definition

    in

    Gummer: Is defined as receiving oral sex from a woman who has no teeth.

  • Jewish sport Car

    in

    Have you heard about the Jewish sport car? It stops on a dime, then picks it up

  • Slide Show

    in

    True Story: My aunt and her son were coming to our house to view an old slide show of London. Currently, my aunt has grey hair. In the slides she had black hair. My dad tells my cousin, “See, your mother doesn’t look old here.” He replies, “Well, you can also see when the Hampton…

  • “Bait”

    in

    Try this on a friend: Every time you say something, tell the other to say the same thing and add “bait” at the end. Example: fish –> fish bait fish (fish bait) dolphin (dolphin bait) seal (seal bait) I master (I masturbate!)

  • At Work . . Or Not

    in

    Bill Smith started the day early, having set his alarm clock (made in Japan), for 6.00 a.m. While his coffee pot (made in Japan), is perking, he puts his blow dryer (made in Taiwan) to work and shaves with his electric razor (made in Hong Kong). He puts on a dress shirt (made in Taiwan),…

  • God’s decree

    in

    God says the world is going to end, so he chooses three famous people to tell everyone. So, George Bush, Bill Gates, and Saddam Hussein come to see, him. God tells them that the world is going to end and tells them to tell their people. George Bush goes live on CNN and tells America,…

  • Bad Jokes 1

    in

    How do you know policemen are strong? Because they can hold up traffic. What do termites eat for breakfast? Oakmeal. What do massage therapists eat for dinner? Spa-ghetti. Why were the suspenders arrested? For holding up a pair of pants. How does the queen bee get around her hive? She’s throne. What do bees do…

  • Diamonds Are . . .

    in

    A businessman boarded a plane and sat next to Hannah, an elegant woman wearing the largest and most stunning diamond ring he had ever seen. He asked her about it. “This is the Egoheimer diamond,” Hannah said. “It’s beautiful, but there is a terrible curse that goes with it.” “What’s the curse?” the man asked.…

  • THE CIGARS

    in

    A defendant in a lawsuit involving large sums of money was saying to his lawyer, “If I lose this case, I’ll be ruined.” “It’s in the judge’s hands now,” said the lawyer. “Would it help if I sent the judge a box of cigars?” asked the defendant. “Oh no!” said the lawyer. “This judge is…