5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • Jack and Jill

    in

    Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a quiet smoke. Jack returned with lung cancer and Jill a fatal stroke.

  • Breakfast at Looooong Last (!)

    in

    Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother’s Day morning. As the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen, she lay in eager anticipation the lovely breakfast her helpful, caring children were making for her. However, after a good long wait, she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both…

  • Distinguishing Ranks Easily

    in

    General Faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful than a locomotive. Leaps tall buildings in a single bound. Walks on water. Lunches with God, but must pick up tab. Colonel Almost as fast as a speeding bullet. More powerful than a shunting engine on a steep incline. Leaps short buildings with a single bound. Walks…

  • Poor, Defenseless Creature

    in

    A policeman caught a nasty little boy, with a penknife in one hand and a squirrel in the other. “Now listen here,” the policeman said. “Whatever you do to that poor, defenseless creature, I shall personally do to you” “In that case,” said the boy, “I’ll kiss it on the forehead and let it go”

  • Dream Drive

    in

    I often dream of the day when my car will be able to drive me home after a long hard day of work. That’s about the time the driver next to me abruptly blows his horn telling me to wake up and get back into my own lane.

  • Definition of Junk

    in

    Junk- something you keep for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.

  • Palt And Sepper

    in

    I’ve been out of work for a while, so when I found a job sorting salt and pepper, I was most pleased. The only drawback is that it’s seasonal work.

  • Irish

    in

    How do you confuse an Irishman? Line 4 shovels up against a wall and tell him to take his pick.

  • The Donkey

    in

    What do you call a donkey with one leg? A wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye? A winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye making love? A bonky winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one…

  • Difference Between

    in

    HAPPINESS IS . . . Infantry: A good rifle Cavalry: A big tank Artillery: A loud boom UPON HEARING FIREWORKS Infantry: Cool, just like a live fire exercise Cavalry: Not loud enough Artillery: Fireworks? What fireworks? OTHER TRADES Infantry: Waste of rations Cavalry: Waste of rations Artillery: Waste of rations IDEA OF FUN Infantry: Not…

  • Sales Pitch

    in

    Boudreaux’s first military assignment was to a military induction center and because he was a good talker they assigned him the duty of advising new recruits about the government benefits, especially the GI insurance to which they were entitled. Before long the Captain in charge of the induction center began noticing that Boudreaux was getting…

  • Breast

    in

    What’s the quickest way to a woman’s heart? Through her left breast.