Jokes

  • Fight In The City

    Yo momma so fat, she makes Godzilla look like a pocket dragon.

  • Why They Should Shut Up… And More!

    A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you’re in deep water. Anyone who thinks old age is golden must not have had a very exciting youth. How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark to become a teenager who wants to stay out all…

  • Punishment

    Three friends die and go to heaven. The first guy gets handcuffed to one of the ugliest girls there. ”Why?” he asks. St. Paul replies, ”When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.” The same happens to the second guy. He asks why. St. Paul replies, ”When you were nine you killed…

  • Goat Pen

    A Dane, a Norwegian and Snakeyboy made a wager on who could remain inside a goat pen the longest. First out was the Dane, who came out after just 10 minutes yelling “Damn! The goat stinks!” After him the Norwegian went in, and after half an hour he came out yelling, “Damn! The goat stinks!”…

  • Interrupted

    Why did God make man first? Because he didn’t want to be interrupted by woman!

  • Bob ______

    “This storm is bad,” Bob thundered.

  • Frozen Blond

    What do you call frozen blonds? Frosted Flakes!

  • Wise Advice

    If your father is a poor man, it’s your fate. But, if your father-in-law is a poor man, it’s your stupidity.

  • Virus Alert

    Hey, everyone, listen up, your attention if you please. We wanna give you a warning, ‘Cause I found out this morning, About a dangerous, insidious computer virus. If you should get it, an email with the subject, ‘stinky cheese’, Better off protecting your chances, Under no circumstances, should you open it, Or else it will……

  • Farm Equipment

    Whats the difference between a black man and a farm tractor? Nothing! The tractor is just an upgrade!

  • Divorce

    What’s the Swedish word for divorce and swearing? Ikea.

  • The TRUE Story of Creation…

    In the beginning, God created the Heaven and the Earth, and the Earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of deep. And the Devil said, ‘It doesn’t get any better than this.’ And so God created Man in His own image; Male and female created He them. And God looked…