Jokes
-
Jesus Christ!
in Jokes[Jesus signed on at 11:29 pm.] Jesus: Hello and welcome to the kingdom of heaven! Bob: Oh wow you mean I can come in? Jesus: All are welcome. Tell me what is the way you died? Bob: Well I was in a coma. Half my family wanted me on life support half didn’t. Jesus: I…
-
Dear Diary,
in JokesMonday: Now home from honeymoon and settled in our new home. It’s fun to cook for John. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said, “Beat 12 eggs separately.” The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls. Tuesday: John wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said, “Serve without dressing.” So…
-
Trip to the Gynecologist
in JokesA woman had an appointment in the morning with her gynecologist and was running late. She hadn’t had the time to give herself a proper washup so she took a washcloth and gave herself a wash in ‘that area’ in front of the sink. She threw the cloth into the wash basket after making sure…
-
You are a Redneck If… #20
in JokesYou are a redneck if: you’ve ever had a family feud over a litter of coondogs.
-
Xbox Mistake
in JokesA boy named Ronald bought a Xbox for Christmas. 7 months later, the Xbox broke. He knew he needed to replace it with a new one, but the shop where he bought it was closed down in favor for a shoe store. He went to the new console shop which was just a kilometer away.…
-
Chicago Snow
in JokesOne weekend, a couple were having breakfast when the radio suddenly blared, “We are expecting 8-10 inches of snow! Please move your car to the even numbered side of the street so that the street sweepers can come through!” So the wife goes out and moves her car. The next weekend, the couple were having…
-
My Name Is…
in JokesThere was a farmer who was very protective of his daughters. Before every date, he would meet the young man at the porch with his shotgun, and if he didn’t measure up, he’d make sure they left. One day all three of his daughters were going out on the same night. The first young man…
-
Geese and Ducks
in JokesQ: What can a goose do, a duck can’t, and a lawyer should? A: Stick his bill up his rear.