Jokes
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Age and Sex
in JokesThis young fellow was about to be married and was asking his grandfather about sex. He asked how often you should have it. His grandfather told him, “When you first get married, you want it all the time, and maybe you’ll do it several times a day. Later on, sex tapers off and you have…
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Smart Child
in JokesA mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter: Mother: “What does the cow say?” Child: “Moooo!” Mother: “Great! What does the cat say?” Child: “Meow.” Mother: “Oh, you’re so smart! What does the frog say?” The wide-eyed little three-year-old looked up at her mother and replied, Child: “Bud.”
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Ending it All
in JokesAn 83-year old woman decided that she’d seen and done everything, and the time had come to depart from this world. After considering various methods of doing away with herself, she came to the conclusion that the quickest and surest method would be to shoot herself through the heart. The trouble was, she wasn’t certain…
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This is What We Call it Here
in JokesThis American is on a business trip to Mexico and has the first day off. He decides he wants to ride a donkey, a traditional Mexican thing. He asks this local man if he can rent a donkey for the day. The man says, “Gringo we call them asses here in Mexico. If you want…
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The Top Five Worst Names to Have.
in JokesDick Hurtz (Yeah, we heard ya.) Dick Assman (I wish that last name was superhero name.) Teola doing the Hula to Hawaii (The New Zealand girl who had that name got rid of it in court.) Rusty Kuntz (Ouch.) A. Fucks (Sorry forgot the first name.) (A Brazilian soccer player’s name.)
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Be Sure That There Is a Problem
in JokesBE SURE THAT THERE IS A PROBLEM. One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops-a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well. At the next stop, however, a big hulk…
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How to Ruin a Joke
in JokesMy mom’s favorite joke, played on some radio station. ORIGINAL JOKE: Johnny- Mother, can I have another piece of cake? Mother- Yes, you may have more cake, but if you do, you’ll explode! Well, Johnny ate another piece of cake and sure enough, he exploded. RIDDLE: What sits next to mother, eats cake and explodes?…
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Bungee Jump
in JokesWhat do hookers and bungee jump cords have in common? They’re both cheap, fast and if the rubber breaks, your dead!
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Pigs and Centipedes
in JokesQ: What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede? A: Bacon and legs