5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • FORE!

    in

    A man is out playing golf one day when he whacks the ball harder then usual. It goes soaring in the air, and the golfer yells, “FORE!” He runs over to find his ball, and he sees a guy holding his head in pain. The man is shouting “I will sue you, and I will…

  • Mike’s Girlfriend

    in

    After directory assistance gave me my boyfriend’s new telephone number, I dialed him — and got a woman. “Is Mike there?” I asked. “He’s in the shower,” she responded. “Please tell him his girlfriend called,” I said and hung up. When he didn’t return the call, I dialed again. This time a man answered. “This…

  • Waiter 1

    in

    Waiter, this lobster has only one claw. I’m sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight. Well, bring me the winner then.

  • Shakespeare

    in

    Knock-knock! Who’s there? Toby. Toby who? Toby or not toby that is the question!

  • Fully Recovered.

    in

    Not to worry: the man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

  • Who Wears The Pants?

    in

    A newlywed couple had just arrived in their honeymoon suite. After unpacking, the husband took off his pants. “Put these on,” he said to his wife. She did and they were obviously much too large. “There’s no way I can wear these – they’re way too big,” she said. “Good! Now you know who wears…

  • Thats a Compromise!

    in

    Q: How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. They merely change the standard to darkness and upgrade the customers.

  • I Didn’t

    in

    Two criminals are talking in a jail cell. “What are you in for?” “Something I did NOT do!” “Sooo… you’re innocent? What did you not do?” “I DIDN’T run fast enough!”

  • Vacationing Wife and Mistress

    in

    A man wanted to determine if both his wife and mistress were faithful to him. So he decided to send them on the same cruise, then later question each one on the other’s behavior. When his wife returned, he asked her about the people on the trip in general, then casually asked her about the…

  • Haircuts

    in

    Haircuts – The difference between men and women. Women’s version: Woman2: Oh! You got a haircut! That’s so cute! Woman1: Do you think so? I wasn’t sure when she gave me the mirror. I mean, you don’t think it’s too fluffy looking? Woman2: Oh God no! No, it’s perfect. I’d love to get my hair…

  • The Short Order

    in

    A man went into a deli shop and took a seat at the lunch counter. “Give me a corned beef sandwich,” he ordered. “Corned beef sandwich is not on the menu, but I can give you a sandwich with corned beef in it, like our Midnight Special.” “What’s a Midnight Special?” “A triple decker with…

  • Jews in the Desert

    in

    Why did the Jews walk around the desert for 40 years? They heard that someone dropped a quarter