animal

“Do you know that your dog bit my mother-in-law yesterday?” “Is that so? Well, I suppose you’ll sue me for damages?” “Not at all. What’ll you take for the dog?”

Teacher: Can you name four animals of the cat family? Mary:Mother cat,Father cat,and two kittens.

One day, Little Johnny’s teacher asked the class “Children, who can answer this question, please raise your hand!” “Mention things you can suck!” “Ice cream, mam!” Little Jane answered. “Good, Jane.” the teacher said, “Anyone else?” “It’s a lollipop!” said Little Steven. “Very good, now it’s your turn Johnny!” the teacher said. Little Johnny, sitting…

Q: What’s invisible and smells like carrots? A: Bunny farts!

This list of chalkboard assignments may be used for your dog when he does not behave well. The below variations and choices will help you pick an assignment. A. Fill in the blanks 1. [xxx] is not food. Spiders; bandaids; ivy and airplane plants; Xmas ornaments; the carved jack-o-lantern; plants from the aquarium; cat litter…

Why does a chicken cross the street? Because it wants to get on the other side!

Zack and his mule were walking down the road when one of Zack’s friends drove up and offered him a ride to town. Zack got into the truck while his mule ran along behind. The mule was right in back of them as they reached 55, and stayed with them as they sped up to…

Q. Have you heard of the dyslexic cow who attained enlightenment? A. It kept on repeating OOOOMMM!

A young boy comes down to breakfast one morning. His mother asks, “Have you done your chores yet?” “No,” replies the boy, “but could I have breakfast first?” “You know the rules, go outside and clean the chicken coop, milk the cow and feed the pigs.” The boy goes down to the chicken coop and…

This young girl about 7 year old had a dog which she took for a walk everyday after school. Well, one day her dog was in heat, so her father told her that she couldn’t walk the dog for a week or so because it wasn’t feeling well. His daughter became very upset and cried…

How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?

Q: Why do people have small dogs? A: So they can carry them in their bags, and when the person farts, they can blame it on the dog.