animal

Can you decipher this phrase? RU[color=red]E[/color] Are you ready: [R U + red E].

What is red, black, has ten eyes, and crawls? I do not know but it is on your head.

Sure fire signs that your cow has mad-cow disease… * Your cow insists on wearing a little A-1 sauce behind each ear as cologne. * She refuses to let you milk her, saying, “Not on the first date.” * Your cow takes up painting and cuts off one of her ears. * Your cow gets…

Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant? A: With a blue elephant gun.

A young man went to a house to pick up his blind date. The girl wasn’t quite ready, so her father invited the lad to sit on the couch and wait. Dad sat in his easy chair and proceeded to read his newspaper, while the family dog, Rover, jumped onto the couch and sniffed out…

A city slicker was driving through the country when he spotted a horse standing in a field. He was quite taken with the animal and so pulled over to ask the farmer if it was for sale. “Afraid not,” said the farmer. “I’ll give you a thousand bucks!” said the city fella. “I can’t sell…

A couple, hosting a dinner party, were interrupted when the maid called the hostess to the kitchen. “Ma’am, the cat climbed up on the kitchen counter and ate the middle of the salmon.” Light on her feet, the hostess told her to replace the missing portion with canned salmon, then returned to her guests. As…

Can You Decipher This Phrase? pu Back up!

A teacher asked his student: Give me an example of 6 animals. The student: 3 Lions, 2 Tigers , and 1 Cheetah !

One day a cat comes walking by meowing, “I can’t do anything right.” So he keeps on pouting and somejoke comes up to him and says, “Why are you crying?” “Because I can’t do anything right.” So the guy helps the cat and a day later the cat could do anything right so he goes…

Can you decipher this phrase? SMOKE G Go up in smoke!

My friend Doug pointed up at a bird circling overhead and said, “Look, it’s an eagle!” “That doesn’t look like an eagle,” I said. “Well of course not,” he shot back amazingly quickly. “It’s travelling incognito. Haven’t you ever heard that “Eagles are Masters of De Skys?”