animal

Two robins were sitting in a tree. “I’m really hungry,” said the first one. “Let’s fly down and find some lunch.” They flew down to the ground and found a nice plot of newly plowed ground that was full of worms. They ate and ate and ate till they could eat no more. “I’m so…

Have you ever seen Moth Balls? You have!!! How did you get their teeny, tiny and poor little legs apart? Ya fiend!

A boy named John was moving away somewhere far from his the home he is already in. But he couldn’t bring the loved kitten he found. So he decided to sneak it. He stuffed the cat in a cardboard box without any holes. Suddenly his mother came up. He quickly taped it shut and put…

Q: What is brown, has four legs, and a trunk? A: A mouse coming back from vacation.

A guy was walking around town with a frog growing out of his head. Another man walks up to him and ask him, “What happened to you?” The frog answered, “Well, it started as a wart on my ass.”

Bought the wife a hamster fur coat for her birthday, she was delighted with it. We went to the fair; took me 4 hours to get her off the big wheel!

Q: What’s the difference between an elephant and a plum? A: Their color.

Old Bubba was fishing along the Bayou for catfish one day when he spots a water moccasin slithering across the water with a toad in its mouth. Being a longtime fisherman, he knows the best bait for large catfish are toads. In a flash, Bubba grabs the snake from behind and carefully removes the toad…

Two neighbors had been fighting each other for nigh on four decades. Bob buys a Great Dane and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill’s yard. For one whole year Bill ignores the dog. So Bob then buys a cow and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill’s yard. After about a year…

Clinton returns from a vacation in Arkansas and walks down the steps of Air Force One with two pigs under his arms. At the bottom of the steps, the honor guardsman steps forward and remarks, “Nice pigs, Mr. President.” Clinton replies, “I’ll have to let you know that these are genuine Arkansas Razor Back Hogs.…

What does the turtle do in the Olympics? The hurdle run!

Did you know… in Louisiana it is illegal to tie an alligator to a fire hydrant and leave it unattended? Really! It’s true!