animal
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Cats
in Jokes“I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.” – Hippolyte Taine “No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are here to welcome me.” – Unknown “There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats.” – Albert Schweitzer “The cat has…
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Don’t Have a Cow.
in JokesWhen was the price of milk the highest? When the cow jumped over the moon.
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BALLBBALLABALLSBALLKBALLEBALLTBALL
in JokesCan You Decipher This Phrase? BALLBBALLABALLSBALLKBALLEBALLTBALL Basket Balls!
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What Do You Get…
in JokesWhat do you get if you cross a dinosaur, a tiger, a crocodile, a spider, and a elephant? I don’t know but you better get out of it’s way!
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Installing Carpet
in JokesA carpet layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady. He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he’d lost his cigarettes. In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump. ”No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes,” he said to himself. He proceeded to…
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Fuck You
in JokesLittle Red Riding Hood: “Oh, grandmother, what big ears you have!” Wolf: “All the better to hear you with.” Little Red Riding Hood: “Oh, grandmother, what big eyes you have!” Wolf: “All the better to see you with.” Little Red Riding Hood: “Oh, grandmother, what big hands you have!” Wolf: “All the better to grab…
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Seventh Law
in JokesNewton’s Little-Known Seventh Law – A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
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Jesus is Watching You
in JokesA burglar had just broken into a house and was stealing anything he could get his hands on. Then he heard a voice. It said, “Jesus is watching you.” Thinking its in his head he continues on his business. Then he hears it again, “Jesus is watching you.” The burglar not very religious but still…
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In And Out of Puddles
in JokesFive toads arrived at the Heaven’s Gates. The man in charge asked for each toad’s name and what they had been doing. The first gave his name and said he had been going in and out of puddles. The man let him through the gate. He interrogated the next three toads and all three too…