animal

  • Cats

    “I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.” – Hippolyte Taine “No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are here to welcome me.” – Unknown “There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats.” – Albert Schweitzer “The cat has…

  • Don’t Have a Cow.

    When was the price of milk the highest? When the cow jumped over the moon.

  • BALLBBALLABALLSBALLKBALLEBALLTBALL

    Can You Decipher This Phrase? BALLBBALLABALLSBALLKBALLEBALLTBALL Basket Balls!

  • What Do You Get…

    What do you get if you cross a dinosaur, a tiger, a crocodile, a spider, and a elephant? I don’t know but you better get out of it’s way!

  • T T T

    Can you decipher this phrase? T T T U I U L P L I T I P O P S E S Tiptoe through the tulips!

  • Installing Carpet

    A carpet layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady. He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he’d lost his cigarettes. In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump. ”No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes,” he said to himself. He proceeded to…

  • Fuck You

    Little Red Riding Hood: “Oh, grandmother, what big ears you have!” Wolf: “All the better to hear you with.” Little Red Riding Hood: “Oh, grandmother, what big eyes you have!” Wolf: “All the better to see you with.” Little Red Riding Hood: “Oh, grandmother, what big hands you have!” Wolf: “All the better to grab…

  • E L G G U R T S

    Can you decipher this phrase? E L G G U R T S Uphill struggle!

  • Seventh Law

    Newton’s Little-Known Seventh Law – A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.

  • DOG THE

    Can you decipher this phrase? DOG THE The underdog!

  • Jesus is Watching You

    A burglar had just broken into a house and was stealing anything he could get his hands on. Then he heard a voice. It said, “Jesus is watching you.” Thinking its in his head he continues on his business. Then he hears it again, “Jesus is watching you.” The burglar not very religious but still…

  • In And Out of Puddles

    Five toads arrived at the Heaven’s Gates. The man in charge asked for each toad’s name and what they had been doing. The first gave his name and said he had been going in and out of puddles. The man let him through the gate. He interrogated the next three toads and all three too…