atwork

It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store’s opening time, in front of the store. A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be…

A new intern at Heart & Cross Hospital was looking for an experienced doctor to sign off on him sending a patient to surgery. He saw a nicely tanned man giving orders to someone else so he walked up to him. “Could you sign this for me?” he asked. The man signed the sheet and…

Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. Indecision is the key to flexibility. Hang in there, retirement is only 30 years away! Aim low; reach your goals; avoid disappointment. Teamwork means never having to take the blame yourself. A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat. If…

A young man was in the process of taking a verbal exam to join the local police force. “If you’re driving a police car, alone on a country road at night, and are being chased by a group of criminals driving sixty miles an hour, what would you do?” he was asked. Without hesitation, the…

An engine driver was taken to court because he derailed a train. The judge asked, “Why did you derail the train?” The engine driver replied, “A man ran in front of the tracks.” The judge replied, “You are a fool. You derailed a train and killed hundreds of people just because of one man, you…

Just in case you are having a rough day, here is a stress management technique recommended in all the latest psychological journals. The funny thing is that it really does work and will make you smile . . . 1. Picture yourself lying on your belly on a warm rock that hangs out over a…

Three friends a surgeon, an engineer, and a politician were discussing which of their professions was the oldest. The surgeon said “Eve was created from Adam’s rib, a surgical procedure.” The engineer replied: “Before Adam and Eve, order was created out of chaos, and that was an engineering job.” The politician said, “Yes, but who…

With a lousy year under his belt a tractor salesman was traveling down a dusty back road in Iowa, when he came across a farmer working his field with an old, broken down tractor. He jumped out of his truck and gave his best sales pitch to the old guy. The farmer stroked his chin…

Three contractors are at a theme park to bid for a job repairing fences – one is from New York, one from Texas and the third from Florida. First to bid is the Florida contractor. He measures up and says, “Well, I reckon we’ll do the job for $900. That’s $400 for materials, $400 for…

Me: “Sir, would you like to use any coupons today?” Customer: “Yes, I’ve been saving them. Here you go!” (He hands me a coupon that had expired five years previously.) Me: “Sir, your coupon is expired.” Customer: “WHAT?! What do you mean its expired? You f***ing b****, you’re just trying to steal my f***ing money!…

A unit of soldiers was marching a long dusty march across the rolling prairie. It was a blisteringly hot day and the men, longing for water and rest, were impatient to reach the next town. A rancher rode past. “Say, friend,” called out one of the men, “how far is it to the next town?”…

You’ve Got The Wrong(est) Number (Note: our customer support number is close to a local driving school’s number.) Me: “Thank you for calling. How may I help you?” Customer: “How much for my daughter?” Me: “Um…” Customer: “She’s 16. It’s her first time. She needs training.” Me: “Sir, I think you want the driving school.”…