atwork

“I finally got my boss to laugh,” said one friend to another after work. “Oh, how?” “I asked for a raise!”

An airplane takes off from the airport. The Captain is Jewish and the First Officer is Chinese. It’s the first time they’ve flown together and it’s obvious, by the silence, that they don’t get along. After thirty minutes, the Jewish Captain mutters: “I don’t like Chinese.” The First Officer replies: “Oooooh, no like Chinese? Why…

A waitress at a restaurant that David worked at had a change of clothes stolen from the break room. To make matters worse, she’d planned on wearing them to the Christmas party. As a brand-new employee, David knew none of this backstory, so you can imagine his surprise when the found a note on the…

The song, “Yankee Doodle” was originally sung by British soldiers to insult the colonialists (which was typical of the British in those days). The Continental Army took to singing it to annoy the British (which was typical of the colonialists).

Outside the Bristol Zoo, in England, there is a parking lot for 150 cars and 8 coaches, or buses. It was manned by a very pleasant attendant with a ticket machine charging cars £1 (about $1.40) and coaches £5 (about $7). This parking attendant worked there solid for all of 25 years. Then, one day,…

Three men were at a business convention where they were discussing cars. One man said, “I am an astronaut, so I drive a Saturn.” Another man says, “I am a pimp, so I drive a cheap Escort.” The last man speaks up saying, “Well, I beat both of you – I am a proctologist, so…

Prison v. Work In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8′ by 10′ cell. At work you spend most of your time in a 6′ by 8′ cubicle. In prison you get three meals a day. At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay…

21st Century… Our communication – Wireless Our dress – Topless Our telephone – Cordless Our cooking – Fireless Our youth – Jobless Our food – Fatless Our labour – Effortless Our conduct – Worthless Our relation – Loveless Our attitude – Careless Our feelings – Heartless Our politics – Shameless Our education – Valueless Our…

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn’t concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it, so they gave me the axe. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn’t suited for it. The…

Real headline: “Air Traffic Controllers Can Apply for Job in Braille”

An architect, an artist and an accountant were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he…

A man was sitting in a plane when another man sat down in the seat beside him. The new fellow was a wreck, pale, hands shaking, biting his nails and moaning in fear. “Hey, pal, what’s the matter?” the first fellow asked. “I’ve been transferred to Los Angeles, California,” he answered nervously. “They have riots,…