blonde

A blonde rings up an airline. She asks, “How long are your flights from America to England?” The woman on the other end of the phone says, “Just a minute…” The blonde says, “Thanks!” and hangs up the phone.

Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? A: So she wouldn’t wake up the sleeping pills.

CNN gets news that 100 blonds are killed in a train accident at Marylebone station. Only one blond left alive. The correspondent goes to her and asks, “Miss, how did it happen?” Blond: “Oh don’t ask about it. All were right as long as all were waiting on the platform for the train. Then came…

Why did the blond make a square pie? Because Pi(r) squared!

Did you hear about the blonde who went shopping for lip-gloss just so she could pass the make-up exam?

A girl was visiting her blonde friend who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend asked, “Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?” “HellOOOooo,” answered the blonde. “They’re watch dogs.”

A Blonde explains to another blonde friend: “I failed the driving test. I entered the circle-way and the sign said “30” so I drove 30 times around.” And the other one says: “You probably counted wrong.”

A guy took his blonde girlfriend on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune. The first day they go fishing, but they don’t catch anything. The same thing happens on the second…

Here’s the background: Bill works in a coffee, bagels, and sandwiches trailer on the campus of CSUC; Chuck is his boss and the owner of the truck, and yes, according to Bill, this actually happened. (Chuck is telling the story). Her: Yes, I’d like a milk with some coffee in it. Me: So, that’s just…

Why did they ban the wave at the local football games? *Too many blondes were drowning. Why was the blonde on the roof of the bar? *Someone told her that the drinks were on the house. Why don’t blondes eat M&Ms? *They are too hard to peel. Why do blondes take the pill? *It’s the…

Before setting off on a business trip to Tulsa, I called the hotel where I’d be staying to see if they had a gym. The hotel receptionist’s sigh had a tinge of exasperation in it when she answered. “We have over 300 guests at at this facility” she said.   “Does this ‘Jim’ have a last…

A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist. “I’m on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me.” Psychiatrist: “Don’t you have a phone in your car?” Blonde: “That was a little too expensive, so I did the next best thing. I put a mailbox in my car.” Psychiatrist:…