blonde

The blond asked for peanuts on the plane, but she once she got them, she gave them back to the stewardess and asks her to check if there really are peanuts in the bag. The stewardess asks why, to which the blond responds: “The bag says ‘May Contain Nuts’”

Q: Why did the blonde have bruises around her bellybutton? A: Because her boyfriend was blond too!

– How many blonds do you need to change a lightbulb ? – Hundred. One holds the lightbulb and the other ninety nine rotates the house.

One day a blonde and her boyfriend went to a car store. He asks her what car she wants but she says, “I dunno.” So he takes her around to all the car shops and she says, “I want the BMW.” He asks her why she wants a BMW and she says, “Because I dunno…

A blonde woman was at work when she received a phone call that her daughter was very sick with a fever. She left her work and stopped by the pharmacy to get some medication. She got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys in the car She didn’t know what…

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all go to a bar. The redhead walks up to the bartender and says,”I’ll have a BL.” So the bartender gives her a Bud Light. The brunette walks up next and says,”I’ll have an ML.” So the bartender gives her a Miller Light. The blonde is catchingon so…

A man was mowing his front yard when his attractive, blonde, female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to her mailbox. She opened the mailbox, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into her house. A little later, she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, again opened…

An agitated patron calls on to the blond waiter and inquired why there was a footprint on his meal. “Well,” the innocent-looking blond waiter replied. “You rushed in here, ordered an omelette and asked me to step on it.”

What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever.

A blond named Pam is appearing on “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire” with Regis Philbin Regis: “Pam, you’re up to $500,000 with one lifeline left: phone a friend. If you get it right, the next question is worth one million dollars. If you get it wrong, you drop back to $32,000. Are you ready?”…

A blonde got a dent in her car and took it in to the mechanic. The mechanic, noticing that the woman was a blonde, decided to have some fun. So he told her all she had to do was take it home and blow in the tailpipe until the dent popped itself out. After 15…

A blonde was driving her brand new, VERY expensive, Mustang convertible, when she saw her brunette friend. She thought that this was her chance to brag about it, so she drove over to her. The brunette recognized her, and said, “Hey!” The blonde smiled; this was her chance. She said, “Hey, look what I got…