blonde

Why does a blonde keep lowering her head in the supermarket? She is looking for low prices.

Q:What did the blonde’s right leg say to her left leg? A:Nothing, they haven’t met yet.

I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. “Do you need some help?” I asked. She replied, “I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can’t get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for…

A man walks into Starbucks. Man: I want a cup of coffee. Blond Waitress: Sure that will be $1.00 The man pays for the coffee, the blond then goes and measures a cup of coffee and brings it to the man, she dumps it all onto his table. Man: I wanted a cup of coffee,…

A blonde with two burnt ears went to the doctor, who asked what had happened. “The phone rang, and I accidentally picked up the iron.” “What about the other one?” “They called back.”

One day little Susie, who is a blond(since this is in the ‘blond’ cat), was at her grandma’s house. She had been there for about two days and today grandma isn’t feeling very well. The grandma is in bed, coughing and it isn’t getting any better. The Grandma tells little Susie to go to the…

Have you heard about the blonde that started writing a diary of all her thoughts? Yes, after 3 years she is on the second page now.

A beautiful blonde goes into a bar and sits down next to a guy that’s so homely looking, he hasn’t had a date in over a year, also, he’s sooooo dumb that one night he slept with a ruler next to his head to see how long he slept. He figures that he has absolutely…

Gloria the blonde once heard that milk baths would make you beautiful. She left a note for her milkman Alan to leave 15 gallons of milk. When Alan read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the door to clarify the order.…

A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde are all about to be shot by a firing squad. The redhead goes out first and stands in front of them. Right before they shoot, the redhead screams, “Tornado!” The firing squad turns to look, and the redhead runs away. The brunette is up next, and decides it…

Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, “Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left.” Thirty minutes later the captain announced, “One more engine has failed…

One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister’s house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store. When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing,…