blonde

A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde are all about to be shot by a firing squad. The redhead goes out first and stands in front of them. Right before they shoot, the redhead screams, “Tornado!” The firing squad turns to look, and the redhead runs away. The brunette is up next, and decides it…

Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, “Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left.” Thirty minutes later the captain announced, “One more engine has failed…

One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister’s house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store. When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing,…

There were two blondes sitting on the roof of a house. The ladder they had used to get on the roof fell down onto the ground. Blonde #1: Go get the ladder! Blonde #2: No way! If I jump down, I’ll kill myself. Blonde #1: I know! I’ll shine my flashlight down to the ground…

“Somejoke complimented on my driving today,” a blonde told her friend, “I found a note on my windshield that said’Parking Fine’.”

A smart blonde (no, that’s not the joke) goes into a bank in New York and asks if she can take out a loan of $1000. The banker, not trusting the woman, asks her for collateral. The woman decides she’ll give the man her brand new BMW for collateral until she can pay the man…

Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch a cold? A: No need for them to worry about blowing their brains out.

Q) How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies? A) 25! One to mix the batter and 24 to peel the m&m’s.

Two blond adventurers were on holiday, and went to see Niagara Falls. After a few drinks one night, one bet the other $500 he couldn’t carry him across the falls on a tightrope. After a very scary trip, his friend managed to stagger safely across, and the wager was duly paid. “That was close,” said…

How can you tell if a blonde woman has been dating? By the belt buckle imprint on her forehead.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead all get together once a week to talk about the problems they are having with their daughters, and get input from the other two moms. So, the brunette decided to open the meeting. “I found a pack of cigarettes on my daughter’s nightstand the other night. What am I…

A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby. One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth, and in the end, there were two little baby boys. The blond guy…