children

  • The Horse-Drawn Carriage

    Little Jimmy, Little Billy, and Jimmy’s father were at an Art Museum. Little Jimmy was looking at a picture of someone in a carriage being pulled by a horse. Little Jimmy brought his father over to look at the picture, and he asked his father, “Daddy, what is this?” His dad replied, “Why, that is…

  • Helpful Priest

    A priest was walking down the street when he saw a little boy jumping up and down to try to reach a doorbell. So the priest walked over and pressed the button for the youngster. “And now what, my little man?” he asked. “Now,” said the boy, “run like hell!”

  • Where is God?

    A couple had two little boys, ages eight and ten, who were excessively mischievous. The two were always getting into trouble and their parents could be confident that if any mischief occurred in their town, their two young sons were involved in some capacity. The parents were at their wit’s end as to what to…

  • God is Watching

    In the cafeteria of a Catholic school, the children were lined up for lunch. At the head of the line was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note and she had placed it in front of the apples. The note read: “Take only one, God is watching.” Further down the cafeteria line…

  • North America

    Teacher: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? John: You told me to do it without using tables. __________________________________________ Teacher: Glen, why do you always get so dirty? Glen: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are. _______________________________________ Teacher: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers…

  • Dentists

    How do the kids of dentists get around the neighborhood? On Molar-Skates

  • Boogie

    How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!

  • The Cow

    James came to school late. TEACHER: James, why are you late? JAMES: I had to take the cow to the bull to mate. TEACHER: Couldn’t your father do that? JAMES: No, I think it’s better for the bull to do it.

  • The Pweigh Station

    3 year old kid: “Guess what? Daddy got you a pway-station!” 7 year old kid: “Really??!! Where is it?” 3 year old: “It’s in p-one mile!”

  • Unruly Child

    A man scolded his son for being so unruly and the child rebelled against his father. He got some of his clothes, his teddy bear and his piggy bank and proudly announced, “I’m running away from home!” The father calmly decided to look at the matter logically. “What if you get hungry?” he said. “Then…

  • Peanuts at the Zoo

    Three mischievous boys went to the zoo one day for an outing, since they had been at school all week. They decided to visit the elephant cage, but soon enough, they were picked up by a cop for causing a commotion. The officer hauled them off to security for questioning. The supervisor in charge asked…

  • Praying to Harold

    A daddy was listening to his child say his prayer “Dear Harold.” At this, dad interrupted and said, “Wait a minute, why did you call God ‘Harold’?” The little boy looked up and said, “That’s what they call Him in church. You know the prayer we say, “Our Father, who art in Heaven, Harold be…