children

An elementary school teacher asked her students to write a truthful report on what they would do if they had a million dollars. There was only one student who recieved an A, and the rest failed for lying. This was the paper with the A: Johnny …

Wilfred had just learned his abc’s and was very scared of doing them in front of the class. The teacher, though, told him that the best way to conquer his fears would be to just go ahead and do it. So, trembling, he stood in front of the class and began. “ABCDEFGHIJLKMNOQRSTUVWXYZ.” “Very good, Wilfred.…

A six-year-old boy told his father he wanted to marry the little girl across the street. The father, being modern and well-schooled in handling children, hid his smile behind his hand. “That’s a serious step,” he said. “Have you thought it out completely?” “Sure,” his young son answered. “We can spend one week in my…

Questions concerning love and wisdom were posed to a group of children (ages 5 to 10). Their responses were amazingly astute and very enlightening, thus proving that all we need to know, we probably learned in kindergarten. WHAT IS THE PROPER AGE TO GET MARRIED? “Eighty-four. Because at that age, you don’t have to work…

The teacher said to the cooking class. “Tell me: what is the most important thing to put in a chocolate cake?” Faith quickly replied, “Your teeth!” The teacher said, “No, the ingredients.” After correcting Faith, the cooking teacher said, “Who can tell me the best way to keep yogurt from spoiling?” Faith answered, “By eating…

A mother was driving her kids to school one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children began discussing the dog’s duties. “They use him to keep crowds back,” said one youngster. “No,” said another, “he’s just for good luck.” A…

Jabu walked into class every morning with a black eye. After a while his teacher got worried and asked him about it. Jabu answered, “Our house is very small, Miss. Me, my mother and my father, we sleep in the same bed. Every night my father asks, ‘Jabu are you sleeping?’ I say, ‘no’ and…

In the school the biology teacher asks the class a question. “Where is an elephant’s sex organ?” Little Johnny, “In his feet ma’am.” Teacher, “How come?” “If he steps on you, you’re fucked.”

The young couple invited their aged parson for Sunday dinner. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked their son what they were having. “Goat,” the little boy replied. “Goat?” replied the startled man of the cloth, “Are you sure about that?” “Yep,” said the youngster. “I heard Pa say to…

Once there was a mom and a dad , they had a daughter called Angelica. So the dad was very thirsty because he had been driving a lot, so he asked his daughter “sweetheart can I have some of your juice?” She answers “daddy no drinking and driving, that’s what the law says!!!”

If you copy from your textbooks, it’s making good use of what you’ve learnt. If you copy from anywhere else, it’s plagiarism.

A mother explained to her daughter, “We didn’t have TVs not to long time ago, sweetie.” She looks at her mother strangely and asks, “Then how did they play their VCR’s?