gross

I woke up one morning knowing I was going to have a bad day. I went to put on my shirt, but when i picked it up, one of the buttons fell off. When i went to put on my pants the button fell off of them too. I went downstairs to eat my breakfast,…

“Do you want me to give you a knuckle sandwich?” “Sure, but I want it cut into triangles and with the crust peeled off.”

Two friends were talking. The first one said to the other, “Hey, have you seen the movie, “Constipated” yet?” The other replied, “Of course not! It hasn’t come out yet.”

-The Vain Person One who loves the smell of his own farts. -The Amiable Person One who loves the smell of other people’s farts. -The Proud Person One who thinks his farts are exceptionable fine. -The Shy Person One who releases silent farts then blushes. -The Imprudent Person One who boldly farts out loud, and…

A man and his friend are out camping and the first one needs to go to the bathroom and they have no toliet paper so he asks his friend what to do. His friend says just wipe it with your hand and smack it on a rock. So the man does so and smacks his…

There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long he could suck it, Said he with a grin, As he wiped off his chin, If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it!

Your dad has something wrong with his brain. After his appointment, the doctor says,”You have a spider, a termite, a pig, a cloud, a piece of poo, a tongue, and a camera in your brain so you’ll have to have no brain for years.” Then the doctor took operation on his brain.

Q: If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea… A: Does that mean that one enjoys it?

Three men, a French, Chinese, and American, decided to have a contest. They wanted to see whose dog could go the longest without going to the bathroom. The Chinese man won after a few hours. A news reporter asked him how he acheived such a feat. He replied, in a rather sing-song way, “Me Chinese,…

Definition of Agony? One armed man hanging off a cliff with itchy balls

What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover? The position of the dirt bag.

A girl in around fifth grade was walking home from school. As she walking she sees a really adorable little boy walking the same way as she is. The little boy comes up to her and says, “Can i walk home with you??” The little girl, being a mean snobby person says, “Oooh, god no!!…