insults

  • Mirror

    You call me ugly? Where is your mirror, boy?

  • Your Breath…

    Your breath is so bad, you need a tic-tac the size of a watermelon!

  • Jews in the Desert

    Why did the Jews walk around the desert for 40 years? They heard that someone dropped a quarter

  • Self-Made

    A man comes to dinner at a new friend’s house. While they eat, the new friend’s small son keeps staring at the guest. Finally, the guest says, ‘Why are you staring at me like that, young fellow?’ The kid says, ‘Daddy told me you were a self-made man.’ ‘I am.’ ‘Well, why did you make…

  • 5 You’re So Poor Insults

    1) You’re so poor that when somejoke rings the doorbell you have to stick your head out the window and yell, “Ding-Dong!” 2) You’re so poor that when I asked if I could use the bathroom at your house your mom gave me two sticks, one to hold the ceiling up and one to fight…

  • You So Ugly

    You so ugly, you make President Bush look hot!

  • Dirty Floor

    Your floor is so dirty, I stepped inside and said “Nice carpet.” You said, “Man, those are cockroaches!”

  • Yellow

    Your teeth are so yellow the sun should be shy to show it self!

  • Sleeping With Pigs

    I heard some guys talking about you yesterday. One said that you weren’t fit to sleep with pigs, but I stuck up for you; I said you were!

  • Sorry Officer

    What do you call an Italian Cop? Guinea Pig

  • Poo

    abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz poo on marigold abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

  • Upside Down!

    You’re so fat you turn the world upside down!