insults

A man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breasts in the mirror. He asks, “What are you doing?” She replies, “I went to the doctor today, and he told me I have the breasts of a 25 year old.” The husband retorts, “Well, what did he say about your 50 year…

Ok here are a few: I will try to be nicer if you try to be smarter. Don’t flatter yourself. I was looking at your friend. I don’t know what makes you so dumb, but it’s really working. Stupidity is not a crime, so you are free to go. If I throw a stick, will…

Some useful descriptions of people you may come into contact with from day to day. 1. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer. 2. Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn’t watching. 3. A room temperature IQ. 4. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold them together. 5. A…

Frankienstien was out on a rainy day and he saw a very ugly guy. “Lookin’ good!” he said to him. Later he saw a super model he said, “So, how’d you get to be a mutant?”

Why are there so few amusement parks in Japan? Because they aren’t tall enough to ride them!

The idiots we have today. They’re so stupid they make turkeys seem smart. They even make sponges seem smarter.

Help reduce air pollution, stop breathing

WARNING: Racial insult to a black person. Why could a black person never get oral sex? Because the black person would taste like horribly burned food.

These pick up lines are so nasty, they’re insults… The word of the day is “legs.” Let’s go back to my place and spread the word. That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor tomorrow morning. I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand. I like every…

You’re so stupid that you sold your car for gas money!

Smart-ass Answer #1 A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat …she said, “Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.” Smart-ass Answer #2 A…

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Yo momma is ugly, And she looks just like you.