insults

In a slave market, an owner is showing his slaves for selling. A man come to the shop and pointing to an American slave and asked, “how much he is?”. The owner said, “$100”. And the man pioint to a Russian slave, asked again, and the owner reply, “$1000”. The man point to Japanese slave,…

You’re so ugly when you were born your parents named you “Shit Happens”

Your cooking is so bad, the homeless give it back!

Johnny comes back from school crying and says, “Mommy all the kids in the school say I have a big head.” His mother replies, “No you don’t Johnny. You have a hideously deformed head. The other children are merely hiding the truth to protect your feelings.”

Don’t let your mind wander. It’s too small to be out on its own.

Could you fax me your photo very very urgently? Mind you it’s really very very urgent, damn serious and very important ….. I’m playing cards and we’ve misplaced the JOKER.

You have a face like a baby, with a brain to match. * Credited to my friend fqzeng.

You’re so dumb, you studied for a blood test!

You’re so ugly, you scare blind children.

A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it.

HE: I’m a photographer I’ve been looking for a face like yours! SHE: I’m a plastic surgeon. I’ve been looking for a face like yours! HE: May I have the pleasure of this dance? SHE: No, I’d like to have some pleasure too! HE: How did you get to be so beautiful? SHE: I must…

Ryan’s teeth were so yellow that when he walked outside, the sun said give me my butter.