insults

Oh, what a shame. It looks like the Ugly Fairy kissed you on both cheeks.

If my dog’s face looked like your face, I’d shave his ass and make him walk backwards!

When I was a little boy, I was considered clever for my age. When you were a little boy, you must have eaten paint chips.

How do you get 100 jews into a car? Throw a quarter in it. How do you get them out again? Tell them Hilter is driving.

I’ll be sober tomorrow, but you’ll be ugly for the rest of your life.

Why did the moron stare at frozen orange juice? Because it said ‘concentrate.’ Did you hear about the moron that got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize he could play it at night! What did the moron say when he put a quarter in the parking meter? Hey! Where is my…

Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your Mom.

You’re so stupid, you threw a rock at the ground and missed.

you’re as smart as a broken calculator!!!!!!!

A friend of mine spent two hours in the salon getting her hair colored, cut, and blow dried. After all that, was it too much to ask to be treated like Cinderella at the ball? Yet when she went to the desk to pay, the receptionist said to her, “Hello, madam, who is your appointment…

Do you know what to say when someone is trying to roast you? “Sorry, but my brain doesn’t interpret stupid.”

When a cop stops you he gives you a ticket,when a cop stops me he gives me his number.