medical
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Bad And Worst News
in JokesA woman walks in to the hospital to visit her husband. She talks to the doctor, and the doctor says,”I have bad news, and worse news.” The woman starts to cry, asking for the bad news first. The doctor replies,”The bad news is that your husband only has 24 hours to live.” The woman starts…
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Better Relationship
in JokesA man walked into a therapist’s office looking very depressed. “Doc, you’ve got to help me. I can’t go on like this.” “What’s the problem?” the docotor inquired. “Well, I’m 35 years old and I still have no luck with the ladies. No matter how hard I try, I just seem to scare them away.”…
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Alzheimer’s
in JokesA patient was waiting for some results from his doctor. When the doctor arrives he says, “I have some good news and some bad news which do you want first.” The patient says, “Give me the bad news first!” Doctor replies, “You’ve got AIDS.” “Oh, no! What could be worse than that?” asks the patient.…
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Excess Weight
in Jokes“Well, Jonathan, what are you going to do about the excess weight you’re carrying around?” the doctor asked. “I don’t understand it, Doc,” Jonathan replied, “I just can’t seem to lose weight. I must have an overactive thyroid.” “Jonathan, the tests show that your thyroid is perfectly normal,” replied the doctor. “It’s your fork that’s…
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Nurse Nurse
in JokesVeronica: Nurse, I am losing my hair! Nurse: Okay, what size paper bag do you need?
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Forget Your Troubles
in JokesDoctor: “Stop worrying so much. Forget your troubles. Throw yourself into your work.” Patient: “But, Doc, I mix paint for a living!”
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Why Politicians Make the Best Patients ?
in JokesFive surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on. The first surgeon says, “I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.” The second responds, “Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded.” The third surgeon says, “No,…
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Jar 47
in JokesA new doctor had arrived in town. He could cure anything and anyjoke. Everyone was amazed with what he could do – everyone except for Mr. Thompson, the town skeptic. Grumpy old Mr. Thompson went to visit this ‘miracle doctor’ to prove that he wasn’t anyjoke special. When it was time for his appointment he…
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Mr Bean in Brain Tumour
in JokesDoctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor. Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy) Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you? Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I’m dumb? Doctor: Then why are you so happy? Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!
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It’s All in the Name
in JokesNathan goes to see his doctor. After a lengthy examination the doctor sighs, and says, “I’ve some bad news for you, Nathan. You have an incurable cancer. I suggest you quickly put your affairs in order.” Nathan is initially shocked, but then, being a calm, solid character, he composes himself and quietly leaves the doctor’s…
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The Nurse and the Psychiatrist
in JokesSheri, the pert and pretty nurse, took her troubles to a resident psychiatrist in the hospital where she worked. “Doctor, you must help me,” she pleaded. “It’s gotten so that every time I meet one of the young doctors here, I end up dating him. And then afterward, I feel guilty and depressed for a…