medical

It was a dark and stormy night in the small Newfoundland village when Jarge’s wife suddenly went into labor. The doctor came to the house and realized there was no time to get to the hospital in the city, the baby was coming now! Just then the power went out. Jarge brought out the kerosene…

‘Doctor,doctor.I think that I’m a bridge.’ ‘What on earth’s come over you?’ ‘Well a car,a bike…..’

Tommy went to a psychiatrist. “Doc,” he said, “I’ve got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there’s somejoke under it. I get under the bed, I think there’s somejoke on top of it. Top, under, top, under. You gotta help me, I’m going crazy!” “Just put yourself in my hands for two…

3 expecting mothers were talking in their doctors office, about the sex of their babies. The first mother said, “I’m having a boy.” “How can you be so sure?” asked the other two. “Well” said the first, “my husband was on top.” The second replied, “If that’s the case then I’m having a girl because…

A man was having a serious surgical operation. When he woke up, he asked his doctor, “Did it go well?” “It went perfectly.” “Then why do I have this headache?” “Oh, that. Halfway through the operation, we ran out of anesthetic.”

The Japanese eat little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. The French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. The Italians…

I was looking at this parked, motorized wheelchair once, and I noticed that it had a dial on it to control it’s speed. At one end there was a turtle, and at the other end there was a rabbit. I just assumed at first that the turtle was representing the slower speed, and that the…

One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and leave her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems OK, but after a…

Patient: I’m in a hospital! Why am I in here? Doctor: You’ve had an accident involving a train. Patient: What happened? Doctor: Well, I’ve got some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first? Patient: Well… The bad news first… Doctor: Your legs were injured so badly that we had…

Doctor doctor! I keep thinking I’m invisible! WHO SAID THAT?!?!?

A nurse dies and goes to heaven. She is met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter who asks her questions about her life. Over St. Peter’s shoulder the nurse spots a man in a white coat sitting on a cloud with a stethoscope around his neck. “Oh brother!” she cries. “Is that a doctor?”…

Why did the book have to go to the hospital? Because it injured its spine.