menwomen
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Seminars for Women II
in Jokes1…Silence, the final frontier – Where no woman has gone before. 2…The undiscovered side of Banking – How to make deposits. 3…Combatting the Imelda Marcos Syndrome – You don’t need new shoes everyday. 4…Learn how not to inflict your diets on other people. 5…Nag Nag Nag – how to overcome your tendency to be a…
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The Afternoon Drive
in JokesOne day an elderly couple was out for an afternoon drive and had to stop for gas. Attendant: ” Would you like me to check the oil?” Wife: “What did he say?” Husband: “He wants to know if I want the oil checked.” Attendant: “Would you like me to top up the washer fluid?” Wife:…
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Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus
in JokesMen are from Mars, Women from Venus RECEIVED FROM AN ENGLISH PROFESSOR: You know the book Men are from Mars, Women from Venus? Well, here’s a prime example of that. This assignment was actually turned in by two of my English students: Rebecca (last name deleted) and Gary (last name deleted). English 44A SMU Creative…
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A Man’s Life
in JokesA man’s life is difficult to understand, when born he struggles to get out of the vagina and then tries the rest of his life to get in!!!
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Pinocchio
in JokesPinocchio had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters when they were having sex. Pinocchio, therefore, went to visit Gepetto to see if he could help. Gepetto suggested he try a little sandpaper wherever indicated and Pinocchio skipped away enlightened. A couple of weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing happily through town and…
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Read the Signs
in JokesOne Christmas, a parent decided that she was no longer going to remind her children of their thank-you note duties. As a result, their grandmother did not receive acknowledgments of the generous checks she had given. However, things were different the following year. “The children came over in person to thank me,” the grandparent told…
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Busted!
in JokesResolving to surprise her husband, an executive’s wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, “…and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair.”
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Lost and Found
in JokesAs the bus pulled away, I realized I had left my purse under the seat. Later, I called the company and was relieved that the driver had found my bag. When I went to pick it up, several off-duty bus drivers surrounded me. One man handed me my pocketbook, two typewritten pages and a box…
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The Person
in JokesFill in the blank: The person who spends all of today bragging about what he is going to accomplish tomorrow probably did the very same thing _________. Yesterday.
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On The Plane
in JokesA guy with a black eye boards his plane and sits down in his seat. He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye, too. He says to him, “Hey this is a coincidence, we both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours?” The other guy says,…
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Before it starts
in JokesA man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, “Get me a beer before it starts!” The wife sighs and gets him a beer. Ten minutes later, he says, “Get me another beer before it starts!” She looks cross, but…