menwomen
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Haunted Husband
in JokesA couple had been married for a long time, but could never get along very well. Many times, late at night, there would be screams and shouts from their house. The old man often screamed these words at her in public, “I’m sick and tired of you! When I die, I will come out of…
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The New Maid
in JokesA guy dials his home phone from work. A strange woman answers. The guy says, “Who is this?” “This is the maid.”, answered the woman. “We don’t have a maid!” “I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house.” “Well, this is her husband. Is she there?” “Ummm …. she’s upstairs in…
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Dating Vs. Marriage
in JokesWhen you are dating….. Farting is never an issue. When you are married ….You make sure there’s nothing flammable near your husband at all times. When you are dating….. He takes you out to have a good time. When you are married ….He brings home a 6 pack, and says “What are you going to…
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Two Guys are Moving About…
in JokesTwo guys are moving about in a Walmart when their carts collide. One says to the other, “Excuse me, but I’m looking for my wife.” “What a coincidence, so am I, and I’m getting a little desperate.” “Well, maybe I can help you. What does your wife look like?” “She’s tall, with dark hair, long…
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How to Punctuate
in JokesAn English teacher wrote this phrase on the board and asked her students to properly punctuate it: “Woman without her man is nothing.” MEN WROTE: Woman, without her man, is nothing. WOMEN WROTE: Woman! Without her, man is nothing.
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For Women Only
in JokesA group of girlfriends is on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: “For Women Only.” Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. “We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor,…
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Serving Two Masters
in JokesA Mormon acquaintance once pushed Mark Twain into an argument on the issue of polygamy. After long and tedious expositions justifying the practice, the Mormon demanded that Twain cite any passage of scripture expressly forbidding polygamy. “Nothing easier,” Twain replied. “No man can serve two masters.”
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What Men Can & Cannot Wear To A Pool
in JokesA few rules for what men can and cannot wear at a private pool. 1) Speedos. Speedos cannot be worn by men under the following conditions: 1A) If when you look down, you can’t see the color of your Speedo, you probably should not be wearing one. No matter how manly your chest may be,…