menwomen

Matters had progressed to the point where the freshman and his date were naked in the motel bed when the girl had a change of heart. “I suppose you’re going to tell me now that you’re waiting for ‘Mr. Right’,” he said dejectedly. “That’s a silly old romantic notion,” laughed the coed. “I’m just waiting…

“You don’t have anything in your head except soccer,” said a wife to her husband. “I’m sure you’ve even forgotten when we got married!” “Of course I haven’t forgotten,” replied the husband. “That was the day England beat Italy 2-1.”

A woman awoke excitedly on Valentine’s Day and announced enthusiastically to her husband, “I just dreamt that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine’s Day! What do you think it means?” With certainty in his voice, the man said, “You’ll know tonight.” That evening, the man came home with a small package and handed…

Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women’s breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. After a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took Dr. Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of…

Women Between the ages of 18 – 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild, and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas. Between the ages of 21 – 30 a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with…

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE – “If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning!” My mother taught me RELIGION – “You’d better pray that will come out of the carpet.” My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL – “If you don’t straighten up, I’m…

A couple enjoyed getting away from their high-stress jobs by spending weekends in their motor home, but their peace and quiet was often disturbed by well-meaning, but unwelcome, visits from other campers. Finally, they found a way to assure themselves privacy. They painted a sign near their RV’s door: “Ask us about our Whole Life…

The ten things a guy knows about a girl: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. They have boobs.

A couple was having a discussion about family finances. Finally the husband exploded, “If it weren’t for my money, the house wouldn’t be here!” The wife replied, “My dear, if it weren’t for your money I wouldn’t be here.”

A new bride told her husband she was concerned that their honeymoon suite in the Watergate Hotel in Washington, D.C., might still be bugged from the Watergate scandal days. The groom agreed to check it out. He looked behind the drapes, he looked behind the pictures, he looked behind the mirrors, he looked under the…

These are just a few of those typical sexist jokes- they make me chuckle ( or groan) so ya know- I’m a girl : ) *what’s worse than a male chauvinist pig? – A woman who won’t do what she’s told. *I married Mrs. Right- I just wish I’d known her first name was Always…

Father: “So you want to be my son-in-law, do you?” Boyfriend: “Not particularly, but since I want to marry your daughter, I haven’t much choice!”