news
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Bumper Stickers
in Jokes1/20/09: End of an Error That’s OK, I Wasn’t Using My Civil Liberties Anyway Let’s Fix Democracy in This Country First If You Want a Nation Ruled By Religion, Move to Iran If You Can Read This, You’re Not Our President Hey, Bush Supporters: Embarrassed Yet? George Bush: Creating the Terrorists Our Kids Will Have…
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Top George Bush Slogans
in JokesTOP GEORGE BUSH SLOGANS 1. I’ll turn capital punishment into a new game show! 2. I promise to get cocaine off our streets: 1 kilo at a time. 3. I’ll finish what Bill started — the interns. 4. Like father, like son. You liked my dad, right? 5. Vote for the GOP, Not OPP. 6.…
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Microsoft v General Motors
in JokesMicrosoft Vs. General Motors At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, “If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would the be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.” In response to Bill’s comments, General…
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What’s The Drill Here?
in JokesThe GOP Congress will re-introduce drilling for oil in the Arctic. Republicans say the environmental effect is minimal; a study shows caribou do not make campaign contributions.
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The Fortune Teller
in JokesDuring a recent publicity outing, Hillary sneaked off to visit a fortune teller of some local repute. In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news. “There’s no easy way to say this, so I’ll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die…
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Anti War Slogans
in JokesActual Anti-War Slogans for the War on Iraq These colors don’t run the world. One nation under surveillance. It’s the oil, stupid. War is expensive, Peace is priceless. Read between the Pipelines No More BuSh. Smart weapons, Dumb president. The only thing we have to fear is Bush himself. How many Lives per Gallon? Patriots…
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Banana Machines
in JokesIn the GDR, at traffic hubs and in front of supermarkets there are “banana machines”. You stick a banana in and five Ostmarks come out!
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Comrade Stalin
in Jokes“Comrade Stalin! This man is your exact double!” / “Shoot him!” / “Maybe we should shave off his moustache?” / “Good idea! Shave it off and then shoot him!”. (In another version, Stalin replies shortly Ili tak [lit. or so], meaning “this way is ok too”, which has become somewhat proverbial).
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What is Politics?
in JokesA little boy goes to his father one day and says, “Daddy, what is politics?” “Well,” his father replied, “let me try to explain it to you this way. Let’s say that you’re the people. I’m the breadwinner of the family so we’ll call me the economy. Your mother is in charge so we’ll call…
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Party Congress
in JokesStalin reads his report to the Party Congress. Suddenly someone sneezes. “Who sneezed?” (Silence.) “First row! On your feet! Shoot them!” (Applause.) “Who sneezed?” (Silence.) “Second row! On your feet! Shoot them!” (Long, loud applause.) “Who sneezed?” (Silence.) …A dejected voice in the back: “It was me” (Sobs.) Stalin leans forward: “Bless you, comrade!”
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BATTERY RECHARGE? I THINK NOT.
in JokesHw does Battery reproduce? Bi pluging it into Boodler’s Giant ass!