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Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846. John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946. Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860. John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960. The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain seven letters. Both were particularly concerned with civil rights. Both wives lost their children while living…

A couple who is having problems in their marriage decide to go on a talk show. The wife complains that her husband does not listen to her and is ungrateful. She blames this on her husband’s career. The host asks the man, “Has being in politics had any affect on your sex life?” Bill Clinton…

G. W. Bush was very depressed that people were saying he is stupid. So he calls his good friend Queen Elizabeth, who says, “Now George, what you need to do is to surround yourself with smart people. Let me show you.” She conference calls Tony Blair in and asks, “Tony, your parents had a baby.…

President Bush toured parts of Missouri that were devastated by a recent tornado. There was one awkward moment, when the President looked at the tornado damage and said, “Don’t worry, we’re going to get whoever did this.”

“President Obama said in an interview over the weekend that he really misses being anonymous. He said, ‘I miss Saturday mornings rolling out of bed and not shaving, going to the market…’ Be careful what you wish for, 2012 is just around the corner!” –Jay Leno “President Obama announced that he will run for re-election…

The politician was sitting at his campaign headquarters when the phone rang. He answered it and listened intently. After a brief moment, his face lit up with a smile. He hung up the phone and immediately called his mother to pass along the good news. “Ma, the results are in,” he shouted joyously. “I won…

Many will recall that on July 8, 1947, witnesses claimed that an Unidentified object with five aliens aboard crashed onto a sheep and cattle ranch just outside Roswell, New Mexico. This is a well-known incident that many say has long been covered up by the US Air Force and the federal government. However, you may…

A merger has been announced between the California Highway Patrol (CHiPs) and the California Fish and Game Department. It will be called Fish and Chips.

The European union has decided the only way to avoid Greece defaulting on its debts is to replace the government and civil service with 300 Spartans !

A visitor from Pakistan was strolling in a park in New Delhi, India, enjoying the greenery and flowers. He needed to empty his bladder badly, but couldn’t find a urinal anywhere. He couldn’t hold out any longer, and went behind a large bush. Just as he was undoing his fly buttons a policeman caught him.…

As usual, things were not going well at the United Nations. Thus, many visiting ambassadors had to room together. It just so happend that Vladimir, the Russian Ambassador, and Umballa, the Zambian Ambassador, were sharing a suite. To pass the time, Vladimir introduced his fellow dignitary to the Russian game of roulette. He produced an…

Today, due to bad health and without regaining consciousness Konstantin Ustinovich Chernenko took up the duties of Secretary General.