oneliners
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Can You Help Me?
in Jokes“Doctor, please, I have a problem pronouncing Ts, Fs and Hs!” “Well then, you can’t say fairer than that.”
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Signs With a Sense of Humor
in JokesSigns in our world… Please be safe. Do not stand, sit, climb or lean on zoo fences. If you fall, animals could eat you and that might make them sick. Thank you. OUR AIM IS TO KEEP THIS BATHROOM CLEAN. GENTLEMEN: Your aim will help. Stand closer. It’s shorter than you think. LADIES: Please remain…
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High Tech Delivery
in JokesMy sister gave birth in a state-of-the-art delivery room. It was so high tech that the baby came out cordless!
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Every Time
in JokesEvery time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom’s wise words: “Don’t pick that up, you don’t know where it’s been!”
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Strange Word Fun
in JokesEnergizer Bunny arrested – charged with battery. A pessimist’s blood type is always b-negative. Practice safe eating – always use condiments. A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother. Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death. I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded. If electricity…
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Actual Headlines (3)
in JokesBritish Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half New Vaccine May Contain Rabies Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing Air Head Fired Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board Hospitals are Sued…