oneliners

Why doesn’t the glue inside the bottle dry?

JCPenny blowdryer: do not use while sleeping ********** caution: hot chocolate may be hot **********

Her name was Virginia. They called her Virgin for short, but not for long!

Girl, “Oh, Superman I love you so much!” Superman,”I don’t blame you.”

Question: How long is a minute? Answer: That depends on which side of the bathroom door you are on!!

What is a pirate’s favourite branch of the military? The Arrrmy… no, the Navy, he’s a pirate!

If at first you don’t suceed…lower your standards!

Definition of alien-people from another country.

What do you call a black person that wants to be and acts just like Jackie Chan? Blackie Chan

My goal is to find a soulmate. It’s not cheating, just multi-tasking.

Don’t follow in my footsteps, I walk into walls.

All things are possible – except skiing through a revolving door.