oneliners

If it weren’t for electricity, we’d all be watching television by candlelight. – George Gobel

A fool and his money are soon partying.

Two white horses fell in the mud and three came out.

Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.

The one who says it cannot be done should never interrupt the one who is doing it.

Italian suppositories. (in-you-end-os)

Q: Why are cannibals such great improvs? A: They keep feeding off each other.

Hickory, Dickory Dock Three mice ran up the clock The clock struck one… The rest got away with minor injuries

Did you hear about the morning after pill for guys? It changes his blood type.

Conserve water and electricity, shower with a steamy hot friend.

Q: What did baby corn say to mama corn? A: Where’s pop corn?

What is a horse’s favourite Shakepearean play? Rodeo and Juliet