oneliners

A clean tie attracts the soup of the day.

Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

What goes oh oh oh? Santa walking backwards

What’s the difference between MJ and Mr. Potato Head? MJ has more noses. How are MJ and a Wal-Mart bag alike? They’re both plastic and hazardous to children.

The journey of a thousand miles … begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.

Registered users win points for submitting and voting on jokes.

Happiness doesn’t bring money. I want to be what I was when I wanted to be what I’m now. The government has at least one problem for every solution. Only the conservatives can make the country like it used to be – a huge swamp full of dinosaurs. Democracy is having freedom of speech, freedom…

IRS… we’ve got what it takes, to take what you’ve got

Les chères léchèrent les chairs.

Q)Where do penguins go to dance? A)The snowball

Always remember that you are unique, just like everyjoke else!

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