oneliners

What can a picnic table do that a musician can’t do? Support a family of six!

What’s green and runs round the garden? The hedge!

One of the greatest labor-saving inventions today is tomorrow.

Possessing only ten teeth. (deca-dent)

My survey which I conducted said that 8 out of 4 people don’t understand fractions.

If flattery gets you nowhere, try bribery.

MADE YOU LOOK!

Take my wife – please!

Why couldn’t the Human Torch get married? He couldn’t find his Match!

Q.Why shouldn’t you wear snow boots? A.Because they will melt!

The only thing truly free of charge is a dead battery.

I make money the old-fashioned way. My salary is the same as it was ten years ago.