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3 young boys were walking along a river bank when they saw a man drowning in the river. Together they manage to pull him out. When they pulled him out they notice that it is in fact George Bush, leader of the free world. George Bush says to the boys, “Thank you oh so much!…

“That wife of mine is a liar,” said the angry husband to a sympathetic pal seated next to him in the bar. “How do you know?” the friend asked. “She didn’t come home last night, and when I asked her where she’d been, she said she’d spent the night with her sister, Shirley.” “So?” the…

Hello, this is probably 327-4681, yes, the house of the famous statistician. I’m probably not at home, or not wanting to answer the phone, most probably the latter, according to my latest calculations. Supposing that the universe doesn’t end in the next 30 seconds, the odds of which I’m still trying to calculate, you can…

A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service, the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan! They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive!…

50° Fahrenheit (10° C) Californians shiver uncontrollably. Canadians plant gardens. 35° Fahrenheit (1.6° C) – Italian Cars won’t start. Canadians drive withthe windows down. 32° Fahrenheit (0 ° C) American water freezes. Canadian water gets thicker. 0° Fahrenheit (-17.9° C) New York City landlords finally turn on the heat. Canadians have the last cookout of…

There were 3 men who wanted to buy toilets, so they went to the nearest store and were looking at the new designs of the toilets. The first guy asks for a toilet that would go nice in his log cabin out in the woods, so the salesman sells him a toilet made of wood.…

Most of us have a bad habit we are constantly trying to break. For me, it’s biting my fingernails. One day I told my husband about my latest solution: press-on nails. “Great idea, honey,” he smiled. “You can eat them straight out of the box.”

Quickly read through the following text and count the number of F’s in it. FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS Managed it? Scroll down only after you have counted them! > >> >>> >>>> >>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>…

Authentic Claims from a Car Insurance agency… “The car in front hit the pedestrian but he got up so I hit him again.” “I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought.” “I started to turn and it was at this point I noticed a camel and an elephant tethered…

A woman from Chelm went to the market one day to buy herring and a loaf of bread. “How much is it?” she asked the storekeeper. “14 cents,” answered the storekeeper to the lady. “14 cents! For what?” asked the lady. The storekeeper explained: “The herring costs 7 cents, and the loaf of bread costs…

Three kids were walking on a beach looking for shells when one of them finds a magic lamp. They rub it, and the genie that comes out said that each could fall into a pit of whatever they desired. The first guy said “Money and treasure” and then he was poofed into a pit of…

A Donkey meets a Buick at the High Road. “Hello car”, the Donkey says. “Hello donkey”, the Buick replies, when suddenly the Donkey begins to cry. “Oh my” the Buick says. “Why are you crying”? “Well, when i now call you car, you can at least call me horse.